​Cue footage of chefs tugging luggage with fresh new looks and longer hair, an exotic new culinary getaway, gratuitous product placements and unnatural commentary involving brand names pronounced in their awkward fullness, and a preggo Padma sporting an Uhura-esque outfit for the Elimination Challenge. Yep, it's FINALS, and oh, how we love it.

Probably the best finals location of any season, freakin' Napa Valley beats Las Vegas (season 1 and the location of the preliminary series this season), Hawaii, Colorado, Puerto Rico and New Orleans. Ok, so maybe not New Orleans...but still, pretty awesome place for the finals.

As if Napa wasn't enough for poor foodies to watch and drool, the cheftestants get to cook and serve their quickfire dishes in the Napa Valley Wine Train, reminiscent of earlier decades of decadence and romantic rail travel. Even better still is the guest judge, the ever-so-slightly effeminate Michael Chiarello, and celebrity go-to chef of California wine country. Paired with Padma's above stated futuristic get-up and the busty and possibly pregnant Gail Simmons (just type in Gail Simmons into google and see what "automatic" search terms pop up), Crush in Napa and some kick-ass local ingredients and you have the semi-final that does not disappoint. That is, until our gal, Jennifer is seemingly sideswiped by the judges and told to pack her knives.

Keeping the sibling rivalry intact was obviously a ploy for an unprecedented finale, since Michael's dish ostensibly faltered more than Jen's (from what we could tell from the skewed editing). Making for a sausage-heavy finale, the two Voltaggio brothers plus our predicted winner, Kevin, will battle it out next week to claim their stake as what promises to be the most sophisticated Top Chef from any season, even if there's no estrogen around.