Do you find yourself longing for simpler times? The good ol' days when technology still had a certain mystique, and you couldn't just hop online 24/7 to check out the latest trends? Well, look no further than the Kelvinator.

To the untrained eye, it might seem eerily similar to a refrigerator, but it's so much more. If this glorious 90-second unveiling from the mid-50s isn't enough to convince you it's time to throw out your stainless steel piece of crap and start hitting up antique stores in search of a Kelvinator, you've got some serious self-restraint.

Do you already have an unrefrigerated banana bin? No? Well what are you waiting for?

With a recent recipe reboot that catapulted the franchise from inedible to subpar, Domino's certainly isn't afraid to toot their own horn. Watching the new commercial that touts a blind taste test win against competitor Papa John's is a little bit like hearing someone boast they're not quite in last place anymore. We get it, your pizza was once ranked so poorly it tied with Chuck E. Cheese in terms of taste (this actually happened), so any sort of improvement seems like something to celebrate.

Still, let's try to keep things in perspective and remember that your group of competitors are getting by on convenience, value and brand recognition. Taste has almost nothing to do with it.

Yep, we're some of those people...You know, the ones that watch the Super Bowl for the commercials as much as the game. While Doritos and Bud Light are always expected to have a good showing, this year's Snickers commercial featuring our favorite dingy Golden Girl, Rose (Betty White) captured our attention. It never ceases to be funny to hear an elderly person say the phrase, "That's not what your girlfriend says." Abe Vigoda also makes an appearance to let the world know he's still alive.

You don't have to be Tim Roth to know at least half of this sign is an outright lie. We hope it's the part about this meal actually being vegetarian.

Via Imgur

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It was high time someone knocked Snakes on a Plane down a peg, that movie had been cashing in on its critical acclaim for far too long. Now, roughly 4 years after its release, Ivar's has been displaying the following poster parodying the cult hit.

​Timely? Maybe not. But we'd expect nothing less than this level of brilliance from the company that brought us the 1980's classic, Dances with Clams.

Innovation at its finest.

Via Fukung.net

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Following yesterday's heartbreaking overtime loss in the conference finals, it's understandable that Vikings fans might be suffering from a serious case of "Football Blues." Fortunately, the good people at Minneapolis' Punch Pizza are giving away free pizza in an effort to help soften the blow.

Simply by displaying the coupon below you can attempt to drown your sorrows and eclipse all those pointless what-if's with a giant disc of cheesy goodness. Just make sure you don't accidentally hand your pizza directly to a Saints fan on the way out.

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For quite some time, there's been serious controversy surrounding the hit show 24. Not because of racially insensitive plot lines or the repeated torturing of suspects, but because no one can go 24 hours without taking a quick break to grab a snack. Fortunately, thanks to our friends at sister site Squid Ink, we've finally seen definitive evidence that CTU agent Jack Bauer does, in fact, eat.

The video below features everyone's second favorite Sutherland stopping mid-bomb diffusing to shill for a Japanese snack called CalorieMate. Thankfully, he does make sure to snip one of the wires before flashing the product logo and cementing a MacGruber-like ending.

We were already sold at the word cheese, but this commercial from Nolan's Cheddar makes us want to devour a brick of cheese and go run a marathon. It's that strong. Okay, that might be a bit of an exaggeration, but we'd definitely watch some sort of athletic event on TV while eating Nolan's Cheddar with a few crackers.

Via Gut Check

The Texas Burger has finally arrived...but not in Texas. As reported by JapanProbe, the McDonald's Texas Burger has started making appearances throughout Japan, and the commercial below has been advertising the barbecue slathered hamburger; one of four menu items in the new Big America Burger line.

Although the Texas Burger looks like your standard barbecue burger, it's hard to not get excited when Kenny Loggins is blaring in the background. Here's to hoping their next commercial will take us on a highway to the danger zone.