Vintage Ad: Underwood Deviled Ham Sandwiches, the Perfect Man Trap

When you're targeting an audience of women, conventional wisdom of 1960s advertising would dictate that you should appeal to their unending desire to snag the perfect man. And, what's the sure-fire way to successfully woo a man in any era? Make him a sandwich, of course.

We're not talking about some ordinary bologna sandwich or a lame turkey on rye, we're talking about a freakin' Underwood Deviled Ham sandwich. Making a picnic with a couple of those bad boys is like the female equivalent of wearing Axe Body Spray--you have to fight off potential suitors with a giant stick--or, in this instance, a utensil from your newly acquired sandwich set.

Clearly a man trap of this magnitude should come with additional warning labels.

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Throwback Advertising: Billy Dee Williams for Colt 45

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Let's rewind to a time where things were simpler. When 3D still meant wearing a pair of red and blue cardboard glasses, basketball shorts barely covered a player's thigh, and Billy Dee Williams was a legitimate star. Okay, so "legitimate star" is debatable, but there's no denying the man was (and still is) pretty damn cool.

Capitalizing on the mass-appeal of anything Billy Dee Williams laid his hands on, Colt 45 offered up the ultimate in celebrity endorsements. Not only was this beverage "Billy Dee Williams approved," it was a vital part of ensuring yourself a good time. After all, he never claimed you'd have a better time with Colt 45 than without it, but, "Why take chances?"

It's too bad they don't make 'em like they used to.

Heineken Dupes European Football Fans

During last year's Champions League match between Real Madrid and AC Milan, Heineken decided to do a bit of viral marketing. Playing on a clever combination of guilt, obligation and fear, the beer company managed to convince over 1,100 people to forgo the game in favor of an event combining poetry and classical music.

In addition to proving that a nagging girlfriend or angry boss can be just as persuasive overseas as in the U.S., the campaign served as an unexpected reminder that it's important to appreciate the joys of sport. Listening to the crowd erupt in excited applause upon realizing they're no longer going to miss the game really tugs at the ol' heartstrings. Plus, who wants to go to a classical concert when you could watch football and drink beer instead?

Vintage Commercial: Kelvinator, Now with Banana Bin

Do you find yourself longing for simpler times? The good ol' days when technology still had a certain mystique, and you couldn't just hop online 24/7 to check out the latest trends? Well, look no further than the Kelvinator.

To the untrained eye, it might seem eerily similar to a refrigerator, but it's so much more. If this glorious 90-second unveiling from the mid-50s isn't enough to convince you it's time to throw out your stainless steel piece of crap and start hitting up antique stores in search of a Kelvinator, you've got some serious self-restraint.

Do you already have an unrefrigerated banana bin? No? Well what are you waiting for?

Easy There Domino's, Let's Not Get Cocky

With a recent recipe reboot that catapulted the franchise from inedible to subpar, Domino's certainly isn't afraid to toot their own horn. Watching the new commercial that touts a blind taste test win against competitor Papa John's is a little bit like hearing someone boast they're not quite in last place anymore. We get it, your pizza was once ranked so poorly it tied with Chuck E. Cheese in terms of taste (this actually happened), so any sort of improvement seems like something to celebrate.

Still, let's try to keep things in perspective and remember that your group of competitors are getting by on convenience, value and brand recognition. Taste has almost nothing to do with it.

Super Bowl, Betty White and Snickers

Yep, we're some of those people...You know, the ones that watch the Super Bowl for the commercials as much as the game. While Doritos and Bud Light are always expected to have a good showing, this year's Snickers commercial featuring our favorite dingy Golden Girl, Rose (Betty White) captured our attention. It never ceases to be funny to hear an elderly person say the phrase, "That's not what your girlfriend says." Abe Vigoda also makes an appearance to let the world know he's still alive.

Vegetarian Meal Seems Doubtful

You don't have to be Tim Roth to know at least half of this sign is an outright lie. We hope it's the part about this meal actually being vegetarian.

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Via Imgur

Fish on a Plane: Starring Salmon L. Jackson

It was high time someone knocked Snakes on a Plane down a peg, that movie had been cashing in on its critical acclaim for far too long. Now, roughly 4 years after its release, Ivar's has been displaying the following poster parodying the cult hit.

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Timely? Maybe not. But we'd expect nothing less than this level of brilliance from the company that brought us the 1980's classic, Dances with Clams.

Billboard of the Day: New Diamond Shreddies

Innovation at its finest.

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Via Fukung.net

Free Pizza Softens Blow for Bitter Vikings Fans

Following yesterday's heartbreaking overtime loss in the conference finals, it's understandable that Vikings fans might be suffering from a serious case of "Football Blues." Fortunately, the good people at Minneapolis' Punch Pizza are giving away free pizza in an effort to help soften the blow.

Simply by displaying the coupon below you can attempt to drown your sorrows and eclipse all those pointless what-if's with a giant disc of cheesy goodness. Just make sure you don't accidentally hand your pizza directly to a Saints fan on the way out.

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